Newton vs Hooke: The Rap Battle

My name’s Hooke, Robert Hooke, and I am the man

This guy Newton’s just a shadow, of all that I am

I discovered the nature of springs because well, I can

But this guy here thinks he’s special, I’m not a fan

You think you’re all that, Hooke, but what have you done?

Discovered that a spring extends when stretched? Ooh, fun!

That’s not discovery, that’s child play, son

Take a look at the awards Isaac Newton has won

Your discoveries were stolen from me, you toerag

Maybe you should go back running to your mum and your dad

You think that you’re a genius, but listen up, lad

While I tell you about Hooke’s law, Newton, are you mad?!

Big deal, you’ve got a law, well I’ve got three!

Are you really comparing you and your rubbish to me?

The only thing I stole from you is all of your dignity

Newton’s first, second and third laws, and the law of gravity

I’ve done wonders in biology and physics, my friend

Let me put this in a way that you might comprehend

I’ve invented many things, and don’t you try to pretend

Cause my discoveries and theories just never seem to end

Are you kidding, listen buddy, please step aside

Maybe you’ll do something decent when you swallow your pride

I invented calculus, which you so nicely denied

Everything that I’ve done has been proved and applied

Every principle you’ve made, every word that you’ve said

You’ve the most absurd theories that my eyes ever read

All this hype about an apple that fell onto your head?!

Could it not have been a big round watermelon instead?

My discoveries outnumber all of yours any day

Understand, Mr Hooke, what I’m trying to say?

You could never outdo Newton, so get out of the way!

F don’t equal k•x, it’s equal to m•a

So forget all you’ve convinced yourself and all that you’ve known

Leave this epitome of brilliance and his theories alone

I’m the best of all the physicists, the king of the thrown

You may’ve discovered cells, but you just got owned!